Do you feel you need to confront her, to get closure, perhaps? Unless that is the case, I wouldn’t recommend seeing her, personally. Even then, I would send her a letter expressing how much she had let me down, rather than confront her face-to-face. People who manipulators take advantage tend to be kind-hearted, sensitive people, and you may well find that she is able to make you feel so guilty about not “helping” her that you either do help her, or you feel awful about refusing her.

Your concern about her possibly manipulating your friends seems to be valid too. She could even make it look like you were just too suspicious of your “poor” friend who really needed your help (making it look like you were at fault)!

I obviously don’t know her or what she is capable of, but you do. What do you think? If all your internal alarm bells are ringing, I don’t think you should ignore them. Do what feels right to you and don’t let others pressure you into doing something that you feel would be a mistake. Trust your gut on this!