Hello JMia: I'm sorry you're having such a difficult time. I see this is your first post here on PC. So...welcome to PsychCentral! I don't really have anything in the way of advice for you. I don't recall you mentioning whether or not you see a therapist in addition to your doc. If not, that may might be something that would be important to consider. I would think it would be important to have someone irl with whom you can talk through all of this on an ongoing basis.

Posting here on PC can help too. There can be a lot of support available here. The more you post, & reply to other members' posts, the more a part of the community you will become. And, in addition, there are the chatrooms where you'll be able to interact with other PC members in real time (once your first 5 posts have been reviewed & approved.) So please keep posting! My best wishes to you.