Not last week, but the Friday before (so it's been ten days) I got a call from my best friend's husband telling me that she had taken her life on Thursday. I was in shock and then I broke down, barely able to speak. I just kept telling him how sorry I was. He told me that he was taking her back to Texas (where she is from) for a private family burial.

I was not thinking clearly at the time and of course, it would not even have been appropriate given the grief he must have been going thru, but I have a million questions to ask him and I don't know how. I knew her long before they got married and was never close to him. But I can't stop thinking about her. About how he is doing. About how things were going and if she left a note. He told me that there was something that he found that he thought she would want me to have, but I don't know what it is. When should I call to check on him and his children (they had none together -- she actually didn't have any), but she was a step mother to his three.

I can't stop thinking about her. And of course, when I do, I cry, so I don't want to call him to meet and just cry and make him feel as tho he needs to console me. What is the way to handle this? He is the only person I know that knows her and can maybe help me to get a handle on this, but I don't want to cause him pain. But maybe he's in pain and no one knew her like I did. Maybe talking to me would be a comfort to him?

Can anyone give me any advice? I feel like I'm climbing the walls. How much time is enough? Too much? I don't know. And that's just trying to deal with the husband. If I got into the meat of my relationship with her and how deeply I feel that loss, I could write a post to rival war and peace, I swear to god! Just any input would be helpful. Thank you.