Maybe a separation away from each other might be good.

When I left my H 10 years ago, I never thought about him while I was away. 2100 miles away fixing up the farm I bought to move into. He was welcome IF & ONLY IF changes were made. He came, we tried, I kicked him out.

He didnt want divorce but was incapable of change & I could no longer tolerate his behaviors....financial, communicatio & emotional connection. All had been lacking for the 33 years but finally was able to leave.