Yes, I live close enough to meet him in person, but I'm such a coward I'm afraid to face him. I have so much guilt and I'm looking to him for answers or absolution or something. I don't even know what.

But I appreciate the encouragement and feedback. I feel very alone right now and, even tho it's only been 10 days, I feel like the other people I know in my life have their own problems and are moving on with life.

They didn't know her like I did and, quite honestly, the other people in my life are very peripheral. I don't really have friends. She was pretty much it. So because I'm not close with anyone else, I think they don't understand that I was actually close to someone and that someone is now gone. They just think she was another casual acquaintance, like they are. So, I don't have a support system and that's why I think I feel so crazy about when/if/how I should talk to the husband. But also why I feel so desperate to do so.

So, thank you.