It sounds like you're in a whole world of hurt right now. First off, I'm sorry about your dad's death! Having clarified that, dealing with some family & folks (especially your ex -- even though you say she's "OK") can be a real mind funk. Add to that being bounced around, having to deal with your own family, your ex's mother...etc. All I can write is that I read your story & have shared many of the feelings you're currently having at one point or another. When my parents come visit & stay with us for a week each year, I want to blow my brains out. All I want to do is be alone. I should be grateful, however, that I still have my dad...even though we don't get along.

So, yeah. I just wanted to respond to what you've written - all I just wrote was a bunch of crap, though! I hope your moods stabilize soon & that you find some peace.