Through suicide attempts, hospitalizations, panic attacks, etc, I'm on alot of meds. It was okay when they were working, but now I just want to stop taking them. I've only been on lithium a couple weeks, and I know I need to give it more time, but there's a part of me that wants to be done with meds. The remeron works for 6 months, then poops out every time. It did this to me 2 years ago too. The zoloft doesn't do much. The lamictal might be too low a dose. I just feel like constantly having medication adjustments is such a hassle. I miss the old me, 4 months ago, that went biking every day and loved to read. Where are you, old self? I don't feel depressed in a crying sense. I don't actually feel that depressed, just lethargic. Then they will want to give me a stimulant and that will give me psychosis. It does every time. I would rather be depressed and functional than have this low grade depression with alot of lethargy and cognitive issues from lithium. I guess I don't know what else to say, I'm fed up.