Catriana, you were affected by what happened in that relaitonship, and not in a good way. You learned a way of living and probably coping methods that you had to in that situation which aren't good for you now. You were hurt, whether your ex had intention to hurt you or not. I'm glad to hear that you are going back to your T, because you are going to need support to recover and find your way back to living the way that you want to. You will need to do some sorting out, and it's going to be hard sometimes, but it will be worth it if you stick with it and work towards your goals.

A lot of survivors question whether what they went through really was abuse or not. I think that most of us want that confirmation that it really happened, and it wasn't the way that we should have been treated, and we really don't have to put up with it ever again.

I don't know anything about what your childhood was like, etc., but there is one piece of good news about your recovery. Not to discount any of your experience at all, but if you had mostly healthy experiences growing up, or even some, then you will have that to draw from and it will make the journey before you now that much easier. When people are abused as children and grow up with the coping skills that they had to develop back then, and don't learn that there is another way, then it is very hard for them to heal and to change because they have been living that way for as long as they remember, and dn't know anything else. Adults who come out of an abusive situation that was recent, and get treatment right away, and had healthy coping skills before, have a lot of things in their favor. It still isn't easy, and I am sorry that you were hurt. I just want to give you a bit of hope and wish you well. Please come back and let us know how you progress.

If you still question whether it was abuse, maybe some of these articles will be helpful:
http://www.suite101.com/welcome.cfm/...motional_abuse