i don't often post here as i find it difficult to even think my feelings thru let alone write or talk about them. however i have reached what i believe to be a breaking point and i don't know what to do. i am always offered good adivce here and there is always a friendly ear here (i love this place) so here goes...i recognize that i am slipping deep into a depression and i have attempted to try and do something about it. i went on the insurance website to try and find a psych healthcare provider, only to be lead to a dead end. it actually said there were no matches to my search. i find it hard to believe since i live in the middle of a highly populated metropolis. poor information on the internet in leiu of an actual provider book in the snail mail...why is that??? it kept referring me to an 800 phone number...i am scared to death to get on the phone and talk to anyone. i have successfully isolated myself from everyone but my husband and kids for almost a week now. i guess i need to let him know what's really going on with me when he gets home from work and ask for his help. i am very afraid...it is all i can do to get out of bed and take care of my kids in the morning. i just can't stand the way i am thinking and feeling, and i don't want to create a potentially unsafe environment for my kids. that's all i have to do is take care of them and it's hard now. i just needed to let some of this frustration out. any advice is greatly appreciated.