Yes, it is a process, and life certainly IS complex. I like your step back and observe approach.

With my ex, I definitely committed my feelings too fast. I committed in every way too fast....... we got engaged after only five months of dating, and only after TWO visits in person. We had been long distance otherwise. We were talking about engagement very early on... within maybe two months or so.

I guess I was so excited to have someone who wanted to marry me, that I literally lost my head. I've never been married and always have wanted this. Plus, I was so in love, that no logic or reason came to mind. Love is blind, as they say. Lesson learned..... a $10,000 loss.