I can't force myself to write, I have gradually been writing more since coming off meds but it still only happens when the mood takes me. Writing authentically can be very exposing, it really opens you up, I don't think there is any way round that, and that's probably how it should be, if you want what you write to be what you want to write. Sorry I don't know how to make it not hurt. Only that for some of us it is necessary to go through that.