Last time I posted here about a month ago, I went to the School & Study Issues part of the forums and ranted about an overly-strict teacher I had from eight years ago who caused me and my other classmates a lot of suffering. They've likely shrugged and moved on since then, but I never have. I guess I wanted to 'let it all out', but now I feel really bad about doing so. What I feel particularly guilty for is revealing the teacher's name in that post and why I did it. I revealed their name because I wanted to humiliate them, to let them know the pain they have caused me. I wanted to give them pain, and receive vengeance.

It completely backfired, and all I'm left with is emptiness and guilt.

In the end, I was too afraid to even check if I got any replies, let alone read them. This has happened many times during my time here. I post something, then am too afraid of negative feedback or even criticism to read the replies, then feel like a complete coward. I'm not sure if having feelings invalidated many times in childhood counts as trauma, but if there's any reason why I feel so afraid, that must be it.

I probably will be too scared to read the replies here, too. Maybe I should just leave the site.