Curious fluffy...how long has it been since you had done those things? I'm trying to figure out how much recovery you have had?

Cause my boyfriend..didn't really cheat on me...but did betray me by being with women that I did not want him around...and he had done it more than 1x.

I struggle with ever being able to trust him again...Not because I feel like he doesn't love me enough...but because if this is his personality...and his need to always be around people...so that when I am not around...he searches these people out....THAN HOW...can I expect he has changed...this is part of WHO he is...needy and doesnt' know how to spend time with himself.

These things don't change over night. I've told him in order for me to consider rekindling a relationship with me...I need to know that he has attended at least 2 therapy sessions (this is a little different because MEN don't usually seek therapy so if he does I will be impressed by that...as women usually are already in therapy).

If this guy is even WILLING to rekindle with you...I think you have to do some things for a period of time until you earn his trust back...Like being an open book...letting him have full access to your phone...email passwords..and even to go so far as installing LIFE360 on your phones.

LIFE360 is a FREE phone app that is a map locator...so when you leave your house...the app..tracks your travel and gives exact locations as to your whereabouts.

If I decide to rekindle my relationship...He (my b/f) will need 360 on his phone...You can "disable" 360 and my boyfriend has in the past. I would have to tell my boyfriend the first time he disabled the 360...I would have serious problems with that and at that point would be unwilling to continue a relationship with him.

Also..again..your talking about a guy...but for me as a woman...If I start to rekindle this...things such as SEX are not going to be the "same" for a while. I know for sure there will be a period of time that I am not going to be in the "giving" mood..as I get flashes of wonder during sex if he has done these things with other women and it makes sex very uncomfortable for me..which rekindles my anger at the situation.

My concern is...for you...is that you seem to be more excited about showing "your changes"...and I"m not sure if you really "love" this person or if you are just feeling guilty for what you have done to this person and feel a strong need to make some stuff up to him?

Also, your changes...if your talking a month or two of working on yourself....than that is not long enough for a person to truly change....

I also know as the person being cheated on when I was younger...not in this situation...I had this real desire to get "even" with my partner..and did go out and cheat to make myself feel better....So are you worried about any retaliation in that way?

I do think if you want to work on this...Life360 is a big help in helping him feel secure about your whereabouts..until you both get to a place of less hostility about this situation