I don’t think you are a horrible person at all. I think you ought to seek help in figuring out why you are putting up with abuse anc why are enjoying being degraded and mistreated and you are hanging on to this boy who is absolutely no good and brings no value to your life.

Sexting to other people while in actual relationship isn’t a good idea at all but your situation is very different. Even if you consider yourself his girlfriend it was hardly a relationship. You were 15 and you’ve met him once. No one I met once in my life would be considered my boyfriend.

Therapy might help you to learn making real life friendships