(((((((((((Jacq))))))))))))))))

You are not a failure. You will never be an example of failure. You are my friend. You are a good person. Not a failure.

You're not giving yourself enough credit dear friend. You are strong enough. I know you are. Somewhere deep inside of you, you know it too. You can do this. I know it's scary, and the threat of messing up is always at the back of your mind, but you can do this. You

If you're not comfortable with your pdoc seeing, then tell them that. I don't think she can force you to show her. It has to be your choice, because it is your privacy. I think you need to trust a person an awful lot to show them something as personal as that.

What happened last night with your family Jacq? Talk to me... I'm here for you, I always will be. Even when I'm bad at being around on the boards, you know where to reach me anytime. I want you to remember that, you're my friend and I love you. It's okay if you want to hide, because I know I feel like hiding a lot myself. But please don't hide from everyone. Please don't isolate yourself when you need a friend or someone to listen. We will all listen and try to help. That's the beauty of this site here - we're on the other side of a computer screen, so it's easier to "talk" to us sometimes.

Ask for help if you need it. You have support here, unconditionally and 100%.

Love ya.

P.S.
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Is it possible to be on a "down" because I was exercising SO much and haven't in a couple days?

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Yep. From what I've heard from my friends and my family (who are all big into athletics) it's a fairly common thing. It could be the endorphins levelling off or crashing, or it could be the psychology of it all. People tend to feel better about themselves when they're doing something positive for themselves, including exercise.