How I feel you all of you here. (AND for others who cope in similar, detrimental ways..)

When we do something like SI, it's a way of "coping."

There's a lot involved in why, and I know the feelings are strong and it's really, really tough to quit...

For ANY coping mechanism we have that is NOT good for us, we must EXCHANGE another, good coping mechanism for it . (or at least a better one.)

Just trying to go "cold turkey" in quitting a working coping strategy isn't enough. We have to replace the bad with something ... and if it's good, that's best.

One thing that I know has helped others who SI, specifically, is to use a red marker instead. To help with the anger, you can "apply" it angrily in streaks....and so you "feel" it... and it's your choice as to whether you use a permanent type marker or one that washes off sooner ( the latter not being serious enough?).

I've seen patients also move over to black markers... representing other feelings, prior to being able to quit coping this way.

Maybe this will work for some of you.... I hope you can discuss other ways, with your T, of replacing the negative coping mechanism with something else... it takes a long time to get to the root of why, and if you can use a different method in the meantime... well ?