I just got out of my car and it was quiet. Nothing waiting for me. I wonder if I fall down and not wake up who will care for me. Who will pick me up. Figuratively I’ve been down. I’m not looking for a rescuer. I’m looking for someone to share life. Is that too hard to ask? I see other people no where anywhere to have a relationship have one. I have so much to offer, is it my gut that women are seeing and be turned around.

Last Xmas party I got an anxiety attack. I was feeling down the mind raced tompoint I couldn’t breathe. Everyone was there with a significant other. Everyone had someone to talk to. Me I was drinking like a fish and hurting. Hurting like I am now. I’m going to write this on my journal so myntherapist can see.