Thank you Rincad for your comforting words.

She has tried all sorts of distractions. She tried to pretend that she was on the high of her life, thinking that all was well. But, it was only temporal. The pain is always there, no matter how much she distracted herself in consuming her time into daily tasks to distract from the trauma. There is a part of us, where we would have a repetitive drowning process, there is a dying cycle that goes on and on again. This is a depersonalised experience, where the system within us repeats what has occurred on the outside, by seeing a place that is not there around us, heading sound that do not belong to reality (psychotic sometimes). This occurs around the time she died. This is just the remainder of her, I guess.