Ok, so here is the thing that weighs most upon my soul and I’d like some advice.

My eldest child is going to be 21 in March. He has learning disabilities, ADHD, dyslexia, and …. socially awkward. The physical act of writing is difficult for him. Fine motor skills are a bit of a problem. But he is kind, loving and respectful.

When he graduated from high school, he applied to a technical school but was denied entry into the program because of his reading ability. He wanted to learn to computer aided drawing and go into animation or video game graphics. He was very depressed but I told him to take a year off, decide what he wants to do with his life. He had worked very hard in school, every night we spent hours working on the material (he was mainstreamed with adjustments made for his disabilities in many classes.) He did this all without complaint.

He’s going to be 21 in a couple of months. I fear that I’ve made him an emotional cripple. He has a group of friends that he’s had since his freshman year in high school, and I’m grateful for that. But I just don’t know what to do. I worry about him every minute of every day.

He worked for a summer after graduation for at his father’s place of employment. He found that very overwhelming. I’ve suggested several jobs in town here that I think that he might be able to do, but it scares him. Having him here is wonderful for me. He does at least half of the cooking, all of the laundry, and a good portion of the cleaning. So he’s not lazy.

He’s unable to drive, so his employment opportunities are very limited. But I think he’s got to go out and meet people. I know he’s embarrassed when family members ask him if he’s working yet.

On the other hand, my depression and anxiety prevents me from working so I’m at a loss how to handle things. And I'd be perfectly content to have him stay here forever, but I know that's not in his best interest.