Through my recovery, I am now realizing that I was abused, emotionally and verbally. Every time we broke up, which was several times whereby I threatened to kick him out, he became verbally abusive, calling me nasty names, swearing at me, yelling at me, etc.... he has told me I am trash, slutty, etc..... he has called me psycho when I confronted him on his lies.

WOW. It is really hitting me HARD how abused I was in this relationship, on top of all the lying and the possible emotional cheating, let alone using me for my money and taking full advantage of my good heart and generosity.

And the fact of the matter is, that I've gotten involved in several abusive relationships at this stage in my life -- not all were abusive, some were healthy and normal, but many were not.

My lesson is to learn how to AVOID these types in the future, and to not be so needy for love that I am willing to accept just any person who shows an interest.

I know what I did wrong this last time. I was on the rebound from the last relationship and wanted true love. I was not truly in love with the person before him.

I need to stand on my own two feet now and be patient for the RIGHT person to come along.

Sure, I can date casually and probably will because I certainly want to have fun and don't want to sit in my house alone all the time..... so I will get out and meet new people but I will NOT jump into just ANY relationship. This has been my mistake in the past.

Well no more. Time to learn the lessons and apply them now.