I also realized that when someone treats you with HATRED rather than LOVE and respect, that that is abuse. This has taken me time to see and realize -- at first with my ex I chalked up his abusive words towards me as anger, hurt feelings and upset. The first time we broke up, he became hateful towards me, calling me names and calling me "trash". But now I see that being hateful towards someone you supposedly love with all your heart and soul can be defined and categorized as emotional abuse.