Open Eyes, I'll be honest--it's been years. Early on in our relationship she set a tone sexually that was pretty...disinterested. So I adjusted to her desires because she seemed to want it less than I and I got tired of getting turned down. I thought of the sex as just one component of the relationship and not the entire thing. So I fulfilled my needs in other ways without involving other people if you get my drift. It just seems like we settled into a groove that wasn't particularly exciting, but that was because that's what we both wanted.
But now as I think back to those earlier years I wonder if she was getting her needs fulfilled elsewhere and that's why she was disinterested.