So i just joined this site and wanted to tell people how extreme this disorder is regarding how much it impacts my life.
So i was not a very social person as a young child. I normally hung out by myself a little ways from everyone else but i could still normally interact and socialize if i wanted to. If someone were to come up to me and decide to socialize i would be ok with that. It got worse the older i got. Now i am in my late teens in college and i do not go out at all besides work and school (although sometimes i skip). I just cannot fathom going out and seeing all those people because i always think they are looking and judging me for every little thing i do whether its the color of my shoes or the way i style my hair. Now i get panic attacks because of things like presentations or even something as small as attending the class itself because i don’t want to see all of those people. People make me nervous, panicked, anxious, terrified because they’re just so unpredictable. How do i know if they will like me? How do i know if i can trust them enough to talk to them? How do i know that they aren’t silently judging everything about me?