I’m divorced. Future ex wasn’t there. Probably because he disappeared on his own lawyer, which is why he never signed the service papers (there was a bad moment when the judge tried to order another attempt at service by publication, but my lawyer had a counterargument), which is why it had to be done by default. I suppose if he resurfaces in the next 90 days the property division or lack thereof might come into question.

I need a new name for future ex. Possibly “gormless twollop.” Or “bad ex” vs. “relatively decent ex.”