I don't need to be motivated to lose weight. I already want to. What I need most is not to have my efforts fought against. "Oh, come on, just a little bit won't hurt you." "Are you sure you don't want any....?" "Well then, would you like some (equally unhealthy food) instead?" "Here, have some more." No, no, no, and no. Please quit asking. After a while, especially when you're dealing with an addiction, it gets harder and harder to keep saying no. (I've had people do the same with alcohol and cigarettes, both of which I have managed to overcome.)

As for complimenting rather than fat shaming, I'm not talking about telling people they don't have a weight problem when they do. I'm talking about dropping the subject and boosting their confidence in other areas. Surely there is something about the OP that can be complimented. When we feel good about ourselves, that's when we make the effort to make healthy choices. There is more to us than what we weigh and/or what we look like.