It's a time of learning about relationships; all relationships can teach us things I think. I've been on the other end; had an ex-boyfriend calling me and writing me after he was married (and I wasn't yet). Even after he and his wife had a baby and he'd be at home babysitting while his wife was out and he'd call me and "complain". I could tell his marriage wasn't what he had expected but he was always a very selfish man and I knew/had experienced that. But I wasn't able to just say, "don't communicate with me anymore". I was relieved when I moved and he no longer had my phone number, etc.

I'm sorry for you the learning came when you wanted comfort and support over the loss of your mother. I don't think keeping in contact with him means shows anything about you except that you found a source of comfort and support that was good for you for a time! Now you will move on and look for something more local and reliable; you're a better judge of people now than you were.