My last one would have, too, and three before that. Unconditional NEGATIVE regard in response to my anger. Clearly, great pain on my part and shutting down or ruptures on those occasions and I never was able to work things out with any of them. What is it that is wrong with me? Definitely incompetent at therapy as well as life in general. Well, could be lots of things wrong with me but I finally decided, after the last T, that the problem lay with the therapists and not me because whatever it is that might be "wrong" with me, that's something I brought to therapy for help with. How can the therapists help with something which they cannot accept?

Yes, like VO's T I know that many people will not want to be in my life if I get mad at them. My mother, aunts, and grandmother had that attitude, too. And THEY certainly didn't accept or positively regard me or whatever I was upset about when I got mad. So I learned as a little kid NEVER to get mad. And I didn't have people hating me but I didn't have any real friends, except my late husband, because I wasn't "real".

Catch-22. Therapy, and/or therapists, need to do a better job with this kind of situation -- if they want the people who come to them for help to learn to live full, happy lives. But. . .I'm not so sure that's high on the priorities of the many whom I have seen.