
Nov 14, 2017, 11:13 AM
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Member Since: Jul 2014
Location: limbo
Posts: 2,052
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Quote:
Originally Posted by golden_eve
I am sooooo sorry you have found yourself in such a toxic and abusive marriage. Why do you feel stuck? Kids, finances? This is heartbreaking to hear that you feel stuck.
And yes, the best thing you can do when you DO feel stuck is to NOT put up with it, draw boundaries, disengage and walk away from the abuse. I would even go so far as to say "that is not acceptable behavior and until you can talk to me respectfully, I will not talk to you." Then walk away, out of the room and stick to your word.
I once did this with an extremely abusive man, who then followed me from room to room, trying to continue the argument, along with more abusive slurs and a raised voice, to the point of screaming at me. I literally had to FLEE the house to get away from him, then finally RAN AWAY from him literally, for my own safety and well-being. I went to a hotel for three days, came back and packed up all my belongings trying not to say a word to him. He of course, followed me around all over the house, then started a huge abusive tirade against me once again.
Yep, I've been through it. I really feel for you..... 
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stuck because I live in a state that makes divorce not easily obtained. 1 year of physical separation first and at this point neither of us wants in the marriage anymore and she is dragging things out and not leaving (it's my lease and apartment she moved back in a couple years ago after having been gone for 3+ yrs under the guise she would be just getting on her feet and only be there a couple weeks) Looking at retaining a lawyer to help enforce a fair separation agreement. but that's costly.
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