So after my last session with my T i wasn’t trying to justify reasons why i should keep my appointment this week. I realized that it’s where I get to vent the most. I can’t vent 100% because sometimes she will cut me off while venting. Other times it’s a problem with disclosure for me. I decided to go.

Here i am running a few minutes late and so i texted her. She calls me back which then that was a major red flag. First thing i thought was that I screwed up the day. She informed me that she double booked for the same time. This is twice already since I’ve been seeing her in the 5 years. It’s not a bad number of times in 5 years but I’m not sure how that happens being that she rights it in a book in front of me as we are setting the time. As it was she gave away my wed without verifying earlier with me. That’s why she then gave me a choice of Monday or Tuesday instead. She was sorry and she told me that she would move her 1pm but that’s not fair to that client. Then now we are set for next week. I told her that it was okay and that she’s human even though it bothered me due to feeling like I’m always last on the list. She knew i was having issues and I did verify with her a few days ago that I was seeing her today. Now I feel like cancelling next week or maybe even going on break. How would you handle this?

The timing was exceptionally wrong and i feel like i always bite the bullet. I prefer to take the hit than another client and have them feel what i feel plus it’s not fair to them for her to cancel on them. I also want to seem rationale and understanding to her but I’m really upset. It’s so much more than a cancellation. I really needed today’s session. My coping skills are sub par even though I told her otherwise. I told her that I’ll be okay. Now i become destructive. I’m not sure how to handle this. She said that she didn’t want a text later telling her that I’m angry at her being that i wouldn’t let her cancel her 1pm. It’s just not right.

i understand that she’s human but this is not the first with me and I’ve heard her speak of a similar issue with another client. She writes things down. Especially in her profession I think you have to be extra cautious not to double book. That was a 40 min drive there and back for me that i could’ve been doing something else.