Hi Soliaree,

I'm so sorry this happened. It's really upsetting when you've gone to a lot of effort to write a letter, and put a lot of careful thoughts into it, and your T doesn't read it before the session. My thoughts are sure with you!

I used to see a T with whom I had a good working relationship. I was thankful because he allowed me to send email, and he was generally quite good about reading it....and often remembered what I wrote, as well. But there were times when he didn't get to read it for one reason or another. Maybe he'd been ill during the week, or something else came up, and he couldn't get a chance to read it even though he wanted to do so. I started bringing in a copy of my emails, especially if I knew it was something I really wanted to discuss in the session and it was an essential part of what I wanted to do that day. Even if he had read it already, sometimes it helped to have a copy of it with us in the room. If he didn't get a chance to read it, then he could read it during our meeting. I know that's not the perfect solution in some ways - we wish they could always get our emails right away and read them before we meet - but for me, that came in handy on a number of occasions. I thought I'd mention it in case it might be helpful.

Thinking of you. I hope you can talk with your T about your feelings about this, and things will get better as you two work things through. It sounds like his choice of words was very unfortunate....I'm really sorry about that :-( Maybe somehow he was having a bad day/week, but even if he was, I wish he could have handled it better.

Take care,
ErinBear