I dunno. I think that we have some power to influence them, yeah. But I think that that is something that we have to learn how to do, rather than something that is likely to happen if only we were harsher on ourself or pulled ourself together or picked ourself up by the bootstraps etc.

For example...

I don't think that we choose the thoughts that pop into our heads (they just occur). But there are things we can do to influence what thoughts are likely to pop into our heads. And there are things we can do once they are there (e.g., divert our attention to something else) etc.

I think that often we don't change things because we don't know how to change them.

I think that often we hold back from changing things because there is some function they are serving for us. We need to figure out alternative ways of meeting that function and then... Giving them up won't be so hard.

I think that often we don't change things because we are afraid that if it is 'that easy' then we are to blame for not having changed it well before now...