Normally, I can physically handle an 12 hour work day with my 2 jobs (8 hours during the day, 4 hours at night, three times a week, 8 hours on the weekends). But last night, I was pushed past my physical abilities threshold when the store manager on-duty asked me to stay to help close, since they were short employees.

Normally, I'd say "No" to working a 14 hour day. I don't know why I said yes. The retail store closes at midnight. I had worked earlier in the day subbing from 8:30 to 4:30 p.m. and was all set for a 6:30 to 10:30 p.m. shift as I had done prior in the week. But, for some reason, I believed the store manager when he said he wouldn't keep the "closers" past 12:30 p.m. He kept us there until 2 a.m. AND, from 1 to 2 a.m., he was making lewd jokes to the other manager on duty (an assistant store manager who is a young woman around age 21). He made the lewd jokes over the headsets we wear to communicate with each other, so that everyone working could hear him.

So, by the time I got home, I was pretty upset. A store manager is supposed to be the person who is supposed to be an impartial and fair resource for his staff of both genders. But, because he made sexually inappropriate jokes at the 21 year old assistant manager's expense (I will not repeat those here, use your imagination), he has, I feel, created a hostile workplace. Because by condoning his own objectifying humor (i.e. making sexually inappropriate jokes), he is sending a message that he is NOT a fair and impartial resource that you could trust if you were having problems working at this retail store; problems with your co-workers, or with your work schedule, etc.

This morning, I called the night manager at 6 a.m. to tell her what had happened. I told her what the store manager said to the assistant manager (she laughed it off when he made her his target for his sexually inappropriate jokes, maybe because she's only 21 and worried about losing her new job promotion status if she spoke up about his totally unprofessional behavior).

I added that, by doing so, this store manager makes the workplace feel unsafe because as the store manager his job is to be a role model, someone safe to go to for work related issues. But do I feel safe trusting this schmuck with any work place issues after what I heard fly out of his mouth? God, no.

Now, the easiest solution is to just quit this retail job and find another retail job. I'm seriously considering it. That said, I have met a lot of teachers who work there part-time, who are near my age, who I actually have things in common with. So, the social aspect of this part-time retail job is very appealing. And, I can handle working the 4 hour shifts at night; just not a 7 hour night shift in addition to my 8 hour day job as a substitute teacher.

I know some of you will think I was stupid to report this store manager's behavior to another store manager (who is a woman). But, I'm 46. I want to work in a retail environment where I don't have to put up with a pervy store manager who could really create a hostile work environment. Maybe the other long-timers at this store know him well and no one's said anything because they value their job.

And, why shouldn't I speak up? I sat through 8 hours of training videos, some of which were reporting sexual harassment that happened at the store. Well, if a store manager is being inappropriate, his co-store managers should know about it (if they don't already, who knows).

Why should I be afraid to risk retribution or some kind of sabotage from that yucky store manager for calling out his bad behavior to his colleague? That's just not ok, what he did. And he probably has been doing that long before I was hired to work there. But that should not be allowed to take place. It makes for a very unpleasant work environment (at least for me).

What would you have done in my situation? I have a history of sexual abuse in addition to emotional abuse. And, although his lewd jokes were directed at this 21 year old assistant store manager, and not me, I felt he overstepped his boundaries. Maybe it's because I"m 46 and am tired of putting up with men's crap in the workplace when it marginalizes women. As I experienced this summer with my temp job from hell that I posted about here.

Why shouldn't pervy retail store managers be held accountable like their hourly employees? I know that life has battles for us to pick and choose to fight, with outcomes that either benefit or harm our well-being.

I just knew, that if I am going to spend the next 6 months working at this retail store as an hourly employee at night, I am NOT going to put up with another higher up behaving inappropriately. I don't want to hear his lewd, yucky jokes over the headsets we have to wear, while we put away "500s" (clothes that customers left in fitting rooms) and straighten up the store. That is why I told the other store manager about her colleague's behavior. Maybe that'll cost me my job there, but if it does, there are other retail stores I can work at.