-like you said, she doesn't know how hard it is for me to go a long time between sessions
-she doesn't know that I used to self harm (since it's not a current problem for me I see no reason to tell her)
-she doesn't know that I abuse drugs
-she doesn't know how much of a hold my ED has over my life
-she doesn't know how much I know about therapy, psychology, and the therapy process (i play dumb about it, I don't know why, I like to see what she will and won't tell me even if I already know)
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stay afraid, but do it anyway.
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