Hi Brent, as someone who suffers from depression, I get your thought process.

I am a couple years older than and I had to go through a major shift in who I was over the span of about 6 years. It was the toughest process I've had to endure, especially suffering from depression. I went from working in media, to working with at risk youth, to now attempting to become a specialized doctor (not a MD).

To this day, I still have thoughts of crawling into a hole and never coming back. I have made an armada of mistakes in my life, seen so much pain and suffering from myself and others, and my community has also seen me go off the deep end.

But, I take each day as it is and tell myself that if I have made it this far, I can make it one day more. Day after day.

You already have a masters, which is far more education than anyone else has, and you were in a PhD program. The sheer ability to achieve what you have is unmatched by the vast majority of individuals.

I also see the beauty in making yourself better after failing. In cases of wildfires, the landscape grows back better & more beautiful than it had been before. It takes some time, but the results are breathtaking.

People in my community have also accepted me back because people realize that stress & distress are very real things. Things heal and the pieces will positively fall where they may.