Quote:
Originally Posted by BudFox
Sounds like typical therapist sleight of hand. The clinical persona hides the same petty bullsh*t that everyone else is harboring. And nothing brings out therapist wrath more than a client who is doing poorly. It crashes all the savior and guru fantasies. Too much reality. I was ambushed also, though not so blatantly. As long as I was a devotee, it was a lovefest. But when I clued her in on my real experience of therapy, she went a bit mental. It was all about her. From beginning to end.
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"Therapist wrath" is a very apt phrase to label what I experienced. The therapist self-esteem is very bound up with believing that he or she is effective at what he or she is doing. So, if you go into the office saying "I'm not making any progress." the therapist is likely to go into super-defensive mode. The therapist needs to pin the blame for lack of progress on the client. That's unfortunate. It may be that the client would be stuck no matter who the therapist was. Or it may be that the therapist needs to find a different modality of treatment. But, usually, each T. seems to only know one approach.
It would be marvelous if a T. could say, "I don't seem to be having success in helping you." It could be a simple truth, not necessarily reflecting lack of appropriate effort on the part of either the therapist or the client. But no. Therapists are ultra-defensive. Any insinuation that seeing a therapist doesn't seem to be changing anything brings forth vehement proteststion from the therapist that the client must not be working at it . . . because the therapist is never wrong.
No other clinician gets away with this. Your doctor prescribes a medication that doesn't help, so he tries a different medication. Or he tells you that your problem may simply not be responsive to drug intervention.
A lot of what goes on in "therspy" is the T. greets you and says, "So what's going on?" Then the T. settles back and waits while you pour out your issue of the week. Now and then the T. interjects some question or comment. 45 minutes pass, and you go on your way. I don't see a whole lot of science behind this. People do this for years on end (as I did) and they go around with the same problems they came in with. I don't see where T.s have a "quality control" system for assessing whether the client is actually benefitting from the so-called "therapy." Many clients are lonely and happy just to have someone be interested in them. Many have suffered abuse and neglect in their lives and want someone to validate that. Therapists are no fools. They know what will gratify a client and incentivize them to return for more "therapy." The holy grail that many clients are seeking is the absolution expressed as "It's not your fault."