Depression lasted until 11/16. On 11/16 I was too depressed to even go to group. And then on 11/17 - complete switch flip yet again! I felt perfectly fine. I’ve been perfectly fine through the whole weekend, although I did sleep a lot yesterday but I think that’s the meds making me tired. Today I’m in php again and I feel like such a fraud, like I don’t need to be here and I should be at work with everyone else. I’m considering quitting program next week at the end of the week bc really, I don’t need it if I’m feeling fine. It’s a waste of time and money. But I’m sure my program T won’t hear of it.

I’m trying to stay in the moment and not get caught up in thinking about when the next episode will strike. Because maybe it won’t, maybe I’m finally on the right meds and I can relax.

I don’t know. I wish my episodes were less random and I could figure out some trigger. Like what happened that I went from savage depression to completely fine and how can I harness the power?