I just dont understand why my mind has turned for the worse

Its gotten so bad and i was doinh so good i thought

I dont feel like a man at all, feel like a little scared boy that cant take care of himself that is trying to hide it from the world and act like an adult

I need to get out of dads house, get some kind of financial independence (but how can i work like this?) Start driving and stop being fearful, take my life and get away so that i can set up my own rules and boundaries and be in control so that i dont feel so lost...