Why do you need to build a competitive spirit? There is already too much us against them mentality in this world. You child is 5. Let him be 5.

We weren't much into competition-type activities with our boys which was kind of ironic because my husband was a very talented athlete in his day. Rather, we had more of a philosophy of helping our sons simply be comfortable with themselves. When issues arose with others, we encouraged them as much as possible to handle those situations themselves rather than helicoptering in and trying to protect them or fix things for them. We only stepped in when it was an issue that a) they couldn't handle easily by themselves b) after we had discussed a plan of action together they requested our assistance or c) it was truly a matter that needed to be handled by a parent.

We didn't worry about every slight that came up between them and other kids; that's part and parcel to growing up. Kids are not stupid. They can see through other kid's insecurities and character quirks, even when they are very young. It really isn't necessary to jump in and counter everything that other kid says; you are probably bringing more attention to it than really matters to your child -- perhaps you are more bothered by it than your child.

How did that turn out for us? We have 3 very independently-minded grown sons who know how to problem-solve for themselves AND who are quite willing to come to us to talk things through and ask for advice and assistance when needed. They don't collapse at failure. They are kind souls who are respectful of others and are quite capable of seeing through other people's b.s. They have solid personal value systems. They know they are loved and supported, and they know how to love and support others. I call that a win.