We are headed to my mom’s for Thanksgiving tomorrow.

Such mixed emotions. Last year was not a good experience. I’m encouraging myself to set some respectful boundaries and stand my ground.

It’s scary.

I called her to double check the menu with her. She tells me that she has made a gluten free cake for me.

Great!!

First issue and it’s not even tomorrow.

I don’t eat cake. I don’t like it. She has always tried to make me eat deserts and I do not like them.

She makes a gluten free cake FOR ME and now I feel like I have to eat it.

Do I eat a piece out of respect and appreciation for her kindness in thinking of me.

Or

Do I see it as manipulation, stand my ground and tell her, “Thank you, but I don’t like cake!”

I feel like she trying to make me do something I don’t want to do.

*** Trigger ***
She likes to tell people that when I was a baby, I wouldn’t open my mouth when she tried to feed me. She smiles and says that she would pinch me and make me cry so I would open my mouth. She enjoys telling that story.

It feels like she is pinching me now.