That's the thing Jennifer - what he is doing now is much more tame in comparison n he never owned up to it before. So no, its not the same. I left him before bc it was so dangerous n bc I thought I had somewhere to go. Right now I am trying to figure out the crisis stages bc he has never been this "gentle" when in abuse stages before which is what indicates to me he sincerely is trying to "get better".

Therapy is a no go here for 2 reasons:
1. He doesn't trust it so cannot get him to go but even if only I went
2. We want to move to another state so we can get to a place with good mental health care where he can feel safe - and we can't do that if we don't save $ .. We are both on disability so that is hard anyway

I have no friends irl not bc he has isolated me but bc I do not like these ppl n they do not like me.

So - I am trying what I know ... Sorry