It IS most definitely part of the issue! You've got that right. IMO, even supposed mentally "healthy" people have the same issue, or are at some point in the spectrum.

At one end, we have those who go out of their way to show others how much they are cared for, will even make themselves sick in the giving. At the other end you will find those that "love" themselves so much that no one else matters to them and they'll trample on anyone's feelings to get what they want. Doing a quick "scan" of my memories, I doubt that I have ever met anyone that is truly balanced in perfect love for others and for themselves. But of course, we'll never find "perfection" anywhere in the human community.

However, if we are to be Imitatiors of Christ, or be the best that we can be, we need to do whatever we possibly can to try and reach the best balance that is possible for us as individuals.

<font color="blue">If we are to love our neighbor as ourself, Love needs to begin at home, within US. </font>

We need to apply the whole chapter of 1 Corinthians 13 to ourselves, first, and as we grow in that love for self, we can reach out to others with that same love... IMHO, of course. The reverse is also, true. If we give others the benefit of a doubt, if we give them respect until, for some reason, they give us cause to lose that respect, if we give them consideration and compassion, then we need to be doing that for ourselves, too, in equal amounts.

(Boy, does that go against everything I was taught by an extended family of ministers and missionaries when I was growing up!!)