I know this may sound strange, but sometimes it takes lessons like you described to put an end to behaviors that hurt ourselves. From me to you, give yourself maybe one more day max to beat yourself up, and then forgive yourself and really truly vow to keep the drinking to a bare minimum or quit it altogether. Talk about what happened to both your pdoc and/or tdoc so they know you still need stabilization.

It's good you're having yourself checked out. I hope that sex partner doesn't have "anything". If he does, it's possible you won't catch it. Other STDs are more common than HIV, and from what I've learned, even HIV is quite manageable nowadays. Probably pregnancy is your greatest risk. Isn't there still a "day after" pill? Unless you're against such things.