Hi Dshantel, sorry to hear that you're being put through this. It is unfair. I know you said "fake it till you make it", but there is so much faking you can do. And you're hurting yourself as well by trying to repress your emotions. What you said reminded me of a situation with my ex where it seemed like his feelings towards me changed, I love you's seemed cold and affection dwindled. He would claim everything was fine and I tried keeping it together until it fell apart post him betraying me. I am not at all saying your husband will do anything like that, but the one lesson I learned was to take care of me, love me, and keep my cup full so I could be my best. As well as to trust my instincts, which told me from the jump that this man did not love me if he was able to treat me like that, eventually his actions showed me the truth and altho he apologized and tried changing afterwards. I was done.
It sounds like you have children, I know that too complicates things, but imagine if you had a little girl going through this, what would you want for her.. or advise her? Whatever it is, do this for yourself.
Wishing you the best and sending you lots of hugs <3
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