I am so sorry. It is so horrible when you feel like you are doing everything you can, and it's not working. You just want to feel better, but you don't even know what "better" is anymore because you're just waiting for the next mood swing. It's frustrating to feel this way. And I wish I knew what to say to make it better. But I do understand. Just try to hang in there and know you have a lot of people who care about you.