I am not doing good at all right now. I am very depressed. I am crying. I just sent him a message telling him I missed him. I did it on purpose so it would be my last message to him. I want him to know how I feel. Then I blocked him. He doesn't know until he tries to text me tomorrow and I don't respond. Eventually he will probably come to where I work. I don't know what to do. I want to unblock him just to read his messages even though I don't want to respond. I have to keep thinking of this as me being his crumbs. I have NO self esteem. It has a lot to do with how I was raised. I am at rock bottom. I had to put the suicide hotline number into my phone incase I ever need to call. fml