There are probably more appropriate places to put this , but because the "unfeeling hubby" came up here, I'm doing it here.

This was a MAJOR problem for me and because I have had problems and am a crier, I had to find ways to work on it It was joepardizing my marriage.Generalization.....but mostly true is that men ARE doers. From the "get-go", they are wondering "what am I supposed to do" OR "what can I do to make this better." Women are different. We usually need comfort, a shoulder and a sense of empathy. We are not stupid. We know the difference between what somebody else can make better and what they can't.

When upset, I began asking my husband to "just sit for one minute PLEASE" I explained to him that I didn't expect him to be able to make anything better or for him to do ANYTHING. I told him that I needed a sounding board and an ear. I promised him that each time I asked him to sit that I would tell him which it was....Either I just wanted his shoulder for a few minutes or I really did needed his advice. It took some practice, but it has been amazing. I can see his whole body relax when I say "ok, I just need your shoulder for a few minutes." OR, sometimes I say, "ok, I really need your brain & advice on this one" After a few times, when i only wanted an ear, he actually came over to me and put his arm around me He knew that all he had to do was sit there. It made him feel needed , but relaxed. He didn'd have to think or make it better.

This may be old news to most, but it made a world of difference for me and what he has been able/willing to give me. It has even stopped me from having to call t many times. For those w/out spouses, but w/significant others (if they are male) it works too.