My experience/understanding about these things is a bit different.

For instance, taking the same example about a wish to be taken care of. One could ask why is it necessary to get rid of it? Sure, no one can force anyone to get rid of anything.
But my understanding is that as long as you wish for things that are impossible you are unable to accept and enjoy things that are possible.

You propose that there is not need to get rid of these needs and find a partner that sort of satisfies those needs. According to my understanding, if you are able to do that and are able to enjoy and take pleasure you your partner's caretaking (which inevitably is still limited) then you already have given up the wishes for impossible. Because if you weren't then you would not be able to accept and enjoy the limited care of your partner.

According to my understanding, the cited quote talks about such wishes and wants that makes impossible taking pleasure and experiencing enjoyment from things that are realistically possible. I'm not theorising here - these questions are very relevant to me and I struggle with them daily.