Thanks UpDiwn and EmGreen. My family needs me. Their lives would definitely fall apart. They need me. I feel taken for granted, often. Ignored. Alone. I want to separate myself from them, maybe emotionally I have already. I’ve failed them in ways. Not in all ways, I know. They need me. Sometimes I feel I don’t need them. I feel burdened at times by them, by myself. And i resent it. Feeling this way. It’s ugly. Contrary to what a good mother should be, unconditional. My marriage is drifting, and my husband is letting it. He says words, but no actions. I am resentful, and it is terrible to be so. If you had known us. I don’t know where this is going to end. I sent out a brief cryptic email to my T whim I hadn’t seen in quite a while. She’s leaving it up to me if I feel like talking or not. She says it can be helpful “to hear yourself talk and have the right questions asked...”. I hear myself talk in these words I’ve written, and it’s sad. I don’t know what to think, quite. And I’m not sure how she’d react on hearing it either.
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