xRavenx,

I'm so very sorry for your loss. It's terrible that you had to find out so long after his death; and by doing an internet search no less. It sounds like you two had a very special relationship. And a part of him, even when he felt himself to be a monster, knew that both you and his daughter still loved and cared for him. That light in the darkness, I'm sure was bright and even though he might not have seen it, I don't doubt that he felt its warmth.

My condolences for your loss.