Thanks so much.
Something I left out of my post: my mother really made me angry. Just a few minutes after I found out he died and was panicking, at first she said she was so sorry, but two seconds later, she said, "Ok calm down, it's not like you were so close with him recently."
She doesn't even know the half of it, plus, why would she say something so insensitive? Undermining the relationship that we had? Her next favorite thing she likes to do is continue to go on and on about I should never gotten involved with him. She is like a broken record. It's as if she'd rather be "right" above all things, rather than showing a little compassion. I know that my relationship with him was not always a healthy one due to both of our mental health issues, but I still cherish what we had. It is not the right time for me to hear this from her. I took multiple approaches to telling her to please not bring that up, but she keeps making excuses and has gone as far as screaming at me, just because I am hurt with how she is approaching this whole situation. However, she keeps defending herself. If I had a dime for how many times she rubbed this in my face, I'd be rich, I swear.